After watching Captain Marvel three times I vented out my distaste of the film as I didn’t enjoy it.

I watched it as a MCU film but I felt like Marvel was just punishing me for trying to enjoy it like that.

I tried watching it a second time as a superhero film that wasn’t connected to any cinematic universe, as I did with Shazam! with the hope I would like it as thay. It didn’t work out well and it fell flat on that standard.

I gave the film a third chance, and I sat throughout it trying to watch it for impressive cinematics or set pieces. I was hoping I could at least enjoy it for it’s technical aspects. I was bored.

After mulling over this film, I tried pushing myself to like it but I just couldn’t. Instead of yelling into the echo chamber of Captian Marvel hate though I decided to vent my frustrations of the film to people praising it, maybe they would point out something I missed.

I came off as kinda a prick as I was still hungover the film not being enjoyable to me but finally someone gave me an answer I hadn’t tried. Watching the film as a story about overcoming emotional tramua. I decided to give this a try, jumping into the film a fourth time.

But, before I continue I think I should express my background with emotional trauma, my intrest with Captain Marvel, and explain why I’m using Kool-Aid in my title for this.

My interest in Captain Marvel started when I was 12. I had bought a box of comic books from a garage sale and read through the tales to astonish. Captain Marvel was part of that collection, and I enjoyed reading through the comics. She wasn’t my favorite superhero, that goes to Ant-Man and The Wasp, but she was one I enjoyed to read.

To explain the use of Kool-Aid, I’m using it as a substitute for my emotional trauma. I don’t like to talk about my experience so I’ve decided to replace parts of it with Kool-Aid. (Also its kinda humours to me so I want to entertain myself)

To quickly brief through this, I liked Kool-Aid, my family was a soda centered house though. I forced myself to drink soda, enough to the point of saying that I didn’t like Kool-Aid and that it was bad for me. Later in my life I revealed to my “friend” in secrecy that I liked Kool-Aid, hoping I could trust him with this. He later told others at school and I was dragged into a restroom and assulted for liking Kool-Aid. A week later another close “friend” was comforting me over the situation. We we’re watching a movie when he pulled out some Kool-Aid. I told him I didn’t want any but he insisted I had some, telling me “If you like Kool-Aid you shouldn’t be complaining right?” After telling him no I’m not thirsty, he then forced me to drink his Kool-Aid. I was too scared to tell my dad so I just stopped talking to my “friends” and said to myself that I just like soda.

This was emotionally traumatic to me, it forced me into holding myself back and was something that hurts me to this day. I decided that I could watch Captian Marvel and try to relate to her as someone who likes Kool-Aid in a world that likes soda.

Here’s what I concluded. Carol Danvers is a powerful soda drinker, but something seems wrong. She is constantly nagged by these memories of some artificially fruit flavored non-carbonated drink, she questions herself but decides to ignore it. It isn’t till she goes on a mission and is captured by the Skrull, a race of water drinkers whom can change and adapt their taste with Mio™ drink flavors. She’s forced to relive moments in her past where she is told by multiple soda drinkers that Kool-Aid sucks but even in the face of Kool-Aid hate she gets back up, remembering her friend whom always gave her a cold glass of fruit punch flavored Kool-Aid. Throughout the film she meets multiple drinkers some who like coffee, like Nick Fury, some who like lemomade, like Mar-Vel. She learns that she isn’t a soda drinker, and in fact she likes Kool-Aid. She understands that the Skrull were only trying to escape the Kree and enjoy their water in peace.

Watching this in said context seems more emotional than trying to watch it as a superhero film adapting the hero Captain Marvel.